Home » Articles posted by Samantha Matthews (Page 6)

Domestic Violence Awareness Month…

I’m finding it particularly difficult to keep to myself this month. The temptation to just totally expose him for his behavior is really tempting. Every time I go on facebook, there’s a new post about abusive partners, womens rights, etc, etc, etc. I think its great, and it makes me super angry that he dosnt see himself in that behavior. Stupid I know. A narcissist will never admit that his behavior is out of line. I KNOW this, but it still makes me mad. One time I did make a post about how calling names is verbally abusive on my...
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Walking on Eggshells

Everything came very close to an end in these last couple days. To the point I began filling out divorce papers and had him look at child custody situations. Course, after all that, he realized I wasn’t going to fold, and he came and apologized (so that makes maybe 8 apologies in a 13 year relationship). Anyway, realizing my financial situation and where Im at with a car (one is in his name only and has a high payment, the other is in his sisters name, joys of the shitty credit we have), I am trying to just let it...
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Entitled…

So, yesterday He told me I am acting “entitled” and taking advantage of him, in the midst of another argument over how I’m not bringing in enough money, though I have made more money in the last two months than in the four months before, enough to get all caught up in fact. Regardless, he’s angry because even though I am still running our business from home and caring for our baby and running a million errands daily, in between baby naps, taking kid 1 to school and bringing home after, along with working until 11 or 12 every night to...
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Sometimes drowning…

Its strange to me how much more real this all is to me now. I have been wrestling with the idea hes a narc for about a year and a half. Sadly, my realization that he might actually be a narcissist came while I was pregnant with my second child. Talk about devastating. And I went back and forth in my mind for MONTHS before I realized the truth in such a way that it was undeniable anymore. I think I have only come to that understanding in these last few weeks, which is probably why I’ve moved on to...
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Me- Who am I?

Seems like that’s the question every day. I’m figuring it out a bit at a time, I suppose, but here is what I have so far. I am a woman, a fact of which constantly surprises me after being treated like a child for so long. I am a mother, which brings me my greatest joy and my greatest sorrow, as I wouldn’t have any joy without them, my two little lights, and I am heartbroken over the life I have found us in. I’m a college student who is studying psychology, which is how I discovered my husband is beyond...
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