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Narcissistic Betrayal

Narcissistic Betrayal
Narcissistic Betrayal~ I have recently began to wonder at what point you define betrayal in your marriage. Of course, sexual intercourse with someone other than your spouse is probably the major, inarguable one. But what about shaming your spouse in front of your friends. What about confiding all your marital troubles in a “friend” of the opposite sex? What about inappropriate friendships that maybe don’t cross the line to physical, but are inappropriately close? And what if your spouse (who is doing these things) is a narcissist? I would say, I definitely FEEL betrayed. I really thought I didn’t care if...
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How to Manipulate A Narcissist

howtomanipulateanarcissist
How to Manipulate a Narcissist ~ Surviving in a Narcissistic Relationship This isn’t the post I started out writing. In fact, I began by writing a several hundred word tirade about how the Narc is acting like the poor hurt puppy in this narcissistic relationship and how dare he, after all he’s done. Then, I had to take kid one to school and came home again, a little mellowed out. The Narc apologized (hah) and I got to doing some research. I found my answer from others who have lived with Narcs longer than even I have, children of narcissistic parents (my...
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Narcissistic Entitlement

narcissism
So, hes been taking money and spending it on a personal trainer (to the tune of several hundred dollars a month) and telling me his trainer was training him for free since they’re such good buddies and all. (And texting me selfies of him flexing in the mirror, WTF?). The entire time, hes been putting all this pressure on me to try and make more money and do all this extra stuff so we can get ski passes, and telling me how we just don’t have any money, etc. And hes eating out at lunch, no $5 meal for him,...
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How to Live with a Narcissist

howtolivewithanarcissist
How to Live with a Narcissist- Turns out, its not as easy as I thought. Also, once you stop dancing to the narcissists manipulations, they don’t necessarily give up, they just start whining about how you don’t love them anymore, and aren’t trying to make your relationship work. In addition, once you stop freaking out when the narcissist threatens to leave you, they start trying to make YOU leave, i.e. kick you out. I quote, “you just need to leave for a couple days and then you’ll realize that I love you”. Really?! Ugh, I don’t think so. He really thinks that once I...
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8 Self Care Tips

selfcaretips
One of the things I have noticed is as time has gone on and I have been subjected to the Narcissist, I have kind-of given up on myself. There was a time my nails were buffed, my hair stayed neatly cut and dyed, my legs were waxed or shaved. I don’t really take the time to take care of myself at all anymore, but I’m trying to start back up. These things are essential for us as women to feel like we matter! I do understand however, that suddenly getting all glammed up can be a problem for women in...
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Thats Why I Stayed

thatswhyistayed
In the Dark Its funny, I have been discovering more about narcissism and trying to really see my situation for over a year now, and I still seem to feel like I know hardly anything about what I’m up against and how much I am losing. And its not because I am leaving (though he doesn’t know that), its because of him, and his behavior. Spending 12 years thinking we were a team has left me totally vulnerable to his destruction of my life. My credit sucks because he cant manage money AT ALL, and blames me for it. Granted, his...
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Complex PTSD

ComplexPTSD
So, I stumbled across a fun little tidbit the other day, apparently, Complex PTSD actually changes the physical characteristics of your brain. I have been reeling a little from this, and also re-examining the way I view my relationship and the name I’m giving the abuse he is inflicting on me. I mean, technically, he is changing my physical being in a hateful way, so is that not then, physical abuse? The research did study soldiers, not the victims of abusive partners, and having never been in actual war zones, I cannot compare our experiences, though I would imagine their is much...
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“Ashes By Now”, Narcissistic Traits

The kids have been off school this last week and we decided to go to the mountains, even though we really couldn’t afford it and I should have been working. Whatever, it was nice to get away for awhile and we had a nice time with relatively few incidents. Seriously, it was nice, I read a book. Played games with kid one, kid 2 stood on her own for the first time. Seems like everything was peaceful, if not “fine” in the traditional sense of the word. Except for one thing, turns out, hes been talking shit about me and lying...
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You make me sick…

I don’t think I have been sick this often since my oldest daughter started preschool… I know it has to be the stress. Every day is a surprise, I never know what kind of night I’m going to have…. For instance, Monday, I was so sick, fever, chills, SO achy, and home all day with an active one year old. I still tried to make sure I got most of my phone calls made and did some research online for a new revenue opportunity, but just tried to rest and get better. And when jerkface got home, I still had dinner...
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Im NOT crazy…

I couldn’t keep it to myself anymore, and I finally really told someone what I’m dealing with. Luckily, she already kinda knew and has always seen my husband for who he really is (which is why they have never really gotten along). And now I feel SO much better. Just because I know its really, absolutely, 100% not all in my head, and someone KNOWS and supports me. That’s so huge. I feel more accountable now too. I cant let the depression take me over, I have to fight it and get myself to the point of being able to...
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