Any presentation of choice in your relationship with an abuser is really an illusion. They will cajole, pout, or threaten to get their way. Or simply just never stop talking about it until you give up. In addition, if you stand your ground and DONT agree with whatever crazy idea they’re trying to get you to go along with, they act out.
So, if you disagree with his suggestion, on anything, you’re punished for it, even if they appear to go along with your plan. They will pull out all the stops to make sure you know they didn’t want to do whatever, and heaven help you if anything goes wrong, you will for sure be on your own to fix whatever problem there is since it was “your” idea.