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I know I kinda went MIA lately. I suppose in some ways I was terrified of being all “I left him!!! Whoohoo!!!” and then falling on my face or going back to him or some total idiocy like that. But rest assured, that’s not going to happen. I’m cured. No longer the least bit interested in his games and I see right through all his shit (the jerk stuff and the trying to be “nice” stuff) which pisses him right off and is my secret guilty pleasure to make him irritated by not letting him give me stuff… lol!
I do think there are a lot of outside forces keeping me stable as well, living with my parents again for one and knowing I can’t keep ping-ponging my kids (ever again) for another. This was it and I knew it and know it. And I’m happy and don’t miss him at all. I seriously don’t even think about him that much, which is weird and freeing.
At some point, I’ll have words again. And I’ll have to write again. I have thoughts swirling in my head now but I don’t want to dig in and examine them yet. I feel like I need to rest for a while. I just wanted to let you all know I’m ok, and doing good. I got a job doing something I love, my little starts preschool this week, I have hope for the future, and I’m recovering. While still dealing with the divorce.
Love to you all!!! <3